…to have and to hold, for better or for worse…
The difficulty in most marriages is we go to one extreme or the other. We either have one another for life, i.e. we are committed, but not excited and desirous of one another. Or, we hold: we have a great desire for each other, yet lack a long-range commitment and shared goals for the future.
I want to share this tremendous TED talk about the difficult tension in marriage: desire and companionship. “Esther Perel argues, good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. So how do you sustain desire? With wit and eloquence, Perel lets us in on the mystery of erotic intelligence.”
Take a look. When you’re done, I would love to hear your feedback on this short video. (The talk is also available as a podcast on iTunes via TED Talks.
Esther Perel: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship
I have reserved Tuesday-Thursday to write about the power of Christianity for sexual relations, as well as keeping desire alive in relationships. However, today I need your help. We have been working feverishly on launching a brand new podcast called, The FMP. It will tie in with the Family Mentoring Project and be a forum for families BY families.
So far, we envision hosting 1 guest family per episode. They would answer questions in an interview format and provide insight into their daily family lives. I believe it will be a great inspiration to families around the globe. Many think living together with a spouse and children is a piece of cake, but those doing it know the difficulties and the joys. My goal is to peel back the curtain and connect a community of fanatics who are determined to have a great marriage. Interested? Continue reading
I hope you have enjoyed this series. Today we will conclude it with a look at the third part of Paul’s instruction to the church. This one may blow your mind. Prior to diving in, let me give you a little background.
The message of grace and salvation is explicit. It states clearly that there is nothing we can do to earn righteousness. The reason is this; we rapidly start thinking that God owes us something. Take tithing, being kind to your neighbor or fasting for example. The more we do these things, the more we can feel like we have done something to be proud of and that we are now holy. Even a long prayer meeting can be dangerous, because we can feel dangerously holy when we’re done.
How does that apply to a fast from sex? Well the scripture says: Continue reading